Sunday, November 16, 2008


Twas a cool Virginia night, and it was our first night sleeping together. I've been looking forward to cuddle with Chris after a great dinner and all that jetlag.

Cuddling is beautiful: the intimacy; the warmth; the skin-on-skin contact. There's nothing better than having him as my heat generator as I wrapped my left arm around him. I felt soothed as my crotch was pressed against his buttocks and lower back, and my hairy ankles intertwined with his. One arm wrapped around him and pulled him closer to me as my hand stretched out on his hairy chest. I was content.

For two minutes.

My elbow was above his head, but my arm was awkwardly akimbo in the air and my hand started to get numb. It was most comfortable when I put my arm between my chest and his back, but that defeated the whole purpose of cuddling. Then I attempted to put my whole arm under his pillow, but my anterior deltoids prevent me from stretching out too much. I don't think Chris appreciated all this commotion as his head kept rising up and down.

I never really knew what the hell to do with my other arm. I've yet to perfect the art of the cuddle-er as I've always been the cuddle-ee. I'm sure this is a petty subject, like how to tie a zip-up tie. I did learn how to tie a tie with the help of Google. I wonder if Google can help me out with that. Otherwise, can anyone else offer any advice on how to cuddle?


Father Tony of the Farmboyz said...

There is no easy solution to the problem of the uncomfortably placed limb upsetting what is otherwise a comfortable situation. I think most couples soon realize that sleeping involves shifting positions many times in the course of a night. Sometimes the cuddle leads directly to sleep. Sometimes it is the precursor to a more comfortable position next to but not necessarily around each other. I remember the first time I actually spent the night with someone I had met in a bar in the days when I was first launched and getting picked up in bars. He fell asleep in what was an extremely uncomfortable position for me. Never one to be rude, I was afraid to move and I got almost no sleep that night.

My partner and I have developed a ritual cuddle/untangle that works just fine and still allows for the wonderful transfer of body heat.

Dillinger said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tempe said...

Try placing the bewildered limb between his neck and the pillow right above his shoulders or lower part of his neck , I assume you can bend your elbow and reach his shoulder. You can put the other arm around his abs and to pull him closer.

Then you can apply the above suggestion of cuddling and untangling during the night. This is how it is with me and my beau but we've been sleeping together for 6 years so, so we're quite accustomed to each other. I'm sure we had a case of out of place-limbs in the beginning as well.

Happy cuddling!